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None of This Would Be Possible

You know, I was going through e-mails today while we are getting set for the Five Boro on Sunday and decided that I am dedicating today’s post to all the people who make LIPF possible. I was at the CC4C charity event last night, and I was on the verge of tears on the ride home thinking about all the time that has been donated and the contributions made by individuals and companies who are supporting our cause.

To all of you who have made donations, volunteered, bought a tie, or a jersey: THANK YOU! While there are too many to list, your donations mean the world to me because it means you are reading, listening, and talking about what we are trying to do. I cannot thank you enough for your individual commitment to our cause.

To the City Chicks 4 Charity who, without your help, we would never have gotten David’s first event off the ground: THANK YOU!

To Jamie, Jenny, Susan: THANK YOU!

To the folks at OMD who all voted for our Foundation to be included in the 10th Annual OMD donation and actually getting picked… Ray, Mickler, Dasaro, all of you guys: THANK YOU!

The other thing I was not expecting but have been genuinely blown away by is the commitment from companies to sponsor our little organization in a very big way.

As most of you know, I wasn’t the most healthy of guys through 2009 At one point, I was weighing in around 235. In 2009, I lost about 60 pounds after Mom died and was in a very bad place mentally. I never in my life really picked up a weight, I loathed gyms, and while I snowboarded and cycled, I also out ate away any possible health benefit they provided.

In order to get closer to David after the loss of our mom, I made a personal pact with myself that I was going to try to squeeze out some sort of positive out of our loss but also get closer to my brother in his language. So I told him I wanted to be fitter. I had lost the weight, and I was never going to let myself get back to where I was: My inactivity had already destroyed my relationship with my ex, my own personal health was constantly at risk, and I pretty much felt like shit all the time. Not to mention when I looked in the mirror, I wasn’t really liking what I was seeing. It was no wonder that I was tip-toeing and dancing with depression myself during this time. I made jokes about myself and used to stick out my belly. Many of you remember my fat Asian jokes I constantly used when I was referring to myself. The truth of the matter was really this: I was disgusted with myself and didn’t have the wherewithal to do something about it. Instead, I pretended to ignore it, which only compounded and added pounds. It’s a familiar story for many reading this, I am sure.

So I made a promise to myself: I lost a ton of weight under a very bad circumstance. While I was the skinniest I had been since high school, I was also super weak. So I asked David and Jenny to take me to the gym. It was AWFUL… I bitched, I moaned, I was sore all the time. But I had David and Jenny right next to me, and they encouraged me to keep it up. While we all shared a few laughs at my expense—ripped the biggest fart while trying to bench press the first time, spit on myself while doing 15-pound curls, fell off the treadmill because I dropped my iPod and just stopped running instinctively to pick it up—I also saw some changes in me, most notably my attitude. I just didn’t feel the same level of low I had when I was innate. The next thing that happened is that I found a renewed confidence in myself. I was actually battling my depression with exercise, and it was working. It certainly wasn’t and isn’t a cure all. But this newly-added regimen was having a tremendous effect. I looked in the mirror and wasn’t making the same jokes. I noticed that things were firming up that used to flap, and I really started to think about myself in a different light. The veil of depression was lifting, and I could actually see the light at the end of the tunnel.

So I know I was going down the road of thanks, and I promise I am getting to it but bear with me… what I also found was that this more fit side of me was also seeking more active kind of things. I was outside more often—maybe I was climbing a wall or trying a new class. Maybe I would just take a walk that I would not have otherwise done through Central Park or down the west side. Each one of these little steps was another coping skill I had in my arsenal to fall back on if I was feeling blue or down. The more options I had, the more likely I was able to get out of the funk and back into the sunlight. Look, I mean let’s be honest: I still feel like shit from time to time, and sometimes it’s worse than others. But when one thing doesn’t work to help get you out of it, having another thing to try is better than having nothing at all. I promise you this: Getting your heart rate up and pushing yourself physically tends to take your mind off things. And isn’t that really what we are trying to do? To NOT repeat that same downbeat feeling over and over and over again? You give your brain a break, and all of a sudden things feel better.

So anyway, when I put the call-out for sponsors of the Five Boro, I received this e-mail from Jackie Stone literally within a couple minutes of the post: “Tim, we are launching this new site, a couple of us here read your blog how can we be a part?” I looked at what they were doing and was like: Bike ride, check… weights, outdoors, check… things that make me feel better when I am down and seem to help me when I am feeling down are sponsoring our organization?

Not only are they sponsoring the LIPF, but they got six of their people to ride with us on Sunday. It was one of those things that made me kind of take a step back and feel good that our sponsors aren’t just throwing cash but also genuinely supporting what we are doing.

I guess the point here is sort of two-fold: First is a thank you to the Spanfeller Media Group, The Active Times, and RockYou for being a sponsor. THANK YOU!

Secondly, I just wanted to share something that worked for me when I was down, and maybe their site has some content that might kickstart a few arrows for your quiver when your own chips are down. I made the Active Times Link and RockYou links active if you want to check em out.

Regardless a big THANK YOU to all of you who are reading, listening, talking, donating—this isn’t the easiest thing for me to do, and it’s all of your support for me that keeps me going.