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The Cry Baby 2

By April 18, 2012Depression

This morning was a little weird for me. My daily routine tries to include a workout of some sort, followed by a yoga session as a means to stretch so I have a quicker recovery.

It’s rather interesting because I have the unique privilege of being able to take classes at weird hours in the morning (like the 10:00 a.m. I took today). The attendees are what you would expect them to be: that UWS stay-at-home Mom, people in the hospitality industry, and then me.

So anyway, today I am chugging along on the elliptical machine with my usual electronic-ish high BPM to keep me focused, and all of a sudden I get blasted with a wave of emotion. I felt my Adam’s apple swell, my tear ducts loaded up. Here I am on a machine, and I am about to ball my eyes out.

No warning. Nothing in particular triggered it, but all of a sudden, I am floored with emotion and am about to be the sobbing thirty-something on the machine. I contained it. And I know in my previous post, I said and still believe it is okay for guys to cry (even at the gym) if you want. But I didn’t want to. So I kick up the difficulty and am able to take it off the mind for a second, with a mental note to think a bit deeper to see if there was any trigger I was missing.

So following the cardio, I do my weight routine, and then it’s off to the yoga class for some good ol’ fashioned Vinyasa. Yes fellas, this yoga thing is not going away, and actually it’s probably the best post-workout thing you could do since it’s a nice, stretchy warm-down.

So, somewhere between Warrior 2 on my way to Pigeon Pose, a tsunami of emotions hit just as I am resting my head to the ground. No warning, this giant burp of a sob just wells up. In my head, I am like WTF? I can usually tell when something is brewing, and yet something about the relaxation and zoning out of this particular position just dropped the firewall down, and all this emotion welled up out of nowhere.

So again, I am like, “Clear your mind, relax…. where is this coming from?” I get very zen for a bit and just chill it out, letting it happen to me. I am not making a whole lot of noise or anything, but I am letting the emotion just be what it needs to be. It felt good.

And hey, if you can’t be sensitive in a room of women where you are usually one, maybe two guys taking a yoga class, where can you be?

Crying on an elliptical machine is a whole different ballpark. I mean if you have to, go ahead, but ideally it will be at a gym you don’t normally go to.