I know it’s been a awhile. The last couple weeks have been hectic. I’ve got a ton of time to myself, yet I feel like I have no time at all.
As you all know, I am a pretty “roll with the punches” type guy. Through all this tragedy, I have been trying to keep a very positive outlook on everything that has happened and been focusing a lot on me and what possible futures lie ahead.
The Foundation is extremely healthy, and we are making huge strides with respect to our goals. I could not be happier in this regard. But these particular successes aren’t like winning that big deal, or getting the date with the girl or guy you’ve been crushing on for so many months.
The foundation of the Foundation is based on a huge tragedy. None of this would have been possible if my brother hadn’t killed himself on October 15th. So while we keep hitting new milestones, each win has an equal and opposite reaction in my heart. I high-five and cry at the same time. A new company calls and pledges money, or we win the notice of a counseling group, or an individual shares a story of survival with me. All of these things are big wins to me. Huge wins—more important than an ad deal I have ever done, or a business I have ever started. Because I know, at the end of the day, we are doing a good thing and hopefully going to prevent somebody from doing the unspeakable, helping them see the brighter side of being alive.
Yet, all of this would not have been possible had my brother chosen a different alternative to his depression. Selfishly, regardless of all the good we will do in the coming years. I wish, in my heart of hearts, he had chosen life, and I knew not the things I do now, nor felt the feelings I feel every moment of my life.
In that way, the glass is only half-full.
