I was coming back from a very nice dinner gathering that my friend Ashley hosted last night and had the urge to go back to David’s apartment and just reflect for a little bit. I was in Ashley’s bathroom and needed a little time to take in the emotions when something popped into my head. When I was at David’s, I went into the bathroom and took out a little aggression on the towel rack that David used to hurt himself. I’m not saying it would have changed anything, but just a simple word of advice to anybody who is trying to help somebody deal with their emotions and who may be suicidal: Take a couple minutes and look at all the things they have done. Like when you get a home ready for a toddler, and you put the little safety plugs into the electrical outlets. You need to do the same thing for a person who is suffering. I was so meticulous that I forgot the most obvious thing. I should have removed the towel rack the first time and made it more difficult. I’m not playing woulda/shoulda/coulda here, and I think that is important to say. I believe I did my best, and I am not beating myself up over it. But I think it’s an important thing to tell people. If you are taking on the responsibility to be part of somebody’s recovery, listen to the things they say (how they attempted, what they did), and remove those things from the equation. Make it difficult for them to NOT live.
